From time to time, we all harbor a grudge - whether it's someone at work who is bothering us, a family member or a friend. These feelings can eat us up inside and wake us up during the night. The idea of forgiving someone we feel has wronged us deeply can be a bitter pill to swallow, but holding on to our "unforgiveness" is like drinking a bottle of poison and expecting the other person to fall down dead! Suffering is optional. We must forgive in order to free ourselves.
Forgiveness doesn't mean that we condone the other person's behavior, or that we have to tell them that we forgive them. It is a way for us to move on. What is it about the other person that has made you so upset - what did they do or say? Think about it. Do you ever do or say those things to anyone else or to yourself? Have they judged you in a way that you are uncomfortable with? Often an uncomfortable encounter is actually triggering something in you that you need to take a closer look at. Begin with the voice inside that is telling you what that person should do - it's actually what you should do. Try it out and see how it works.
Thank you to Byron Katie for this understanding. If you are interested in this perspective then take a look at her website - www.thework.com.